pursuing the new year

embrace.
that was my word for 2009 and i can't tell you if that's what i did or not. in fact, i don't recall ever thinking about my word once january passed. this year (does it count if i just watched the ball drop in nyc?) will be different. it surely will.

 pursue.

that's my word for 2010. i am going to go in pursuit of my dreams...big, small and ones i haven't even dreamed up yet. pursue.

so what is this word of the year business? you can find out more about it here and here (where i encourage you to download the word of the year discovery tool. while you're there, listen to some of her tracks and download a cd or two. love her, love her sound).

tonight was supposed to be one of the few nights we actually stay up to ring in the new year. we were even going to let our son stay up with us. we were going to drink, be merry and make lots of noise. my husband had to stay really late at work to cook for a persnickety v.i.p. (while the kids and i had leftovers...because i don't cook). i conned my son into believing we rang in the new year at nine p.m. when we watched the ball drop in nyc. i know, i know, how could i? well, i could (and did) because i had an extra kid on my watch today and, dare i say, i was ready for a stiff drink by nine a.m. (and i don't drink). so here i sit, blogging. happy new year. make a wish.

oh, but i must tell you about the most exciting part of my day: purchasing perfume online. my stylish friend (yes, yes, i'm sure i have more than one of you but this one goes way back to the guess? jeans days. i think we bonded over the overalls and big, square bag in seventh grade. and louis vuitton if i remember correctly.) raved about this line, CB I Hate Perfume, and i had to check it out...because i really do hate perfume. she said, "nothing but the purest ingredients" and that sealed the deal. the problem was, it took forever to get on the website (they had exceeded their bandwidth) and there are so many delightful scents to choose from it made my head spin (in a good way). i have decided to try some of the cheaper versions in order to find "the one." i ordered M3 November which is described as, "pumpkin pie, fallen apples, bonfire, wood smoke, dried grass, fallen leaves, wet branches, damp moss, chanterelle mushrooms and a hint of pine" -- how can you go wrong with that? i also ordered Gathering Apples which is "thousands of Ripe, Red, Mackintosh Apples and a bit of old weathered wood from the bushel baskets." one of my favorite activities is picking apples. i've decided you can't go wrong with any scent, though, and it might be worth having the entire collection. i mean, how about M4 Room With A View which "captures the scent of the hills above Florence" --hello? who doesn't want that captured in a bottle (and i've never even been to florence). In The Library, Eternal Return, Just Breathe, Memory Of Kindness...need i go on?

free hugs

remember my free hugs t-shirt? well, yesterday i took my son to church (gasp, i know. long story.) and the sermon was called "experiments in peace." the beginning was about the man who started the free hug experiment (movement?). spooky isn't it? of course, his free hugs started differently than mine but...spooky. it's like i was meant to be there and i was meant to hear that. don't worry, i'm not going to go all preachy on you. for those of you who don't know me (and for those who do), i still believe something between creation and evolution and i probably fall somewhere between atheism and agnosticism, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda. no, i'm not going to argue it and no, you won't/can't change my mind. we went because i read a book recently where the author claims boys need god. in my pursuit of being a good mom, i am going to heed her advice as i do believe my son has questions about god and i know he is interested in god. heck, he might even know god. somewhere along the way he has learned to say grace before meals (which we do consistently),  he asked for a nativity this past christmas and he would like to celebrate chanukkah (or at least incorporate channukkah into our christmas) so i'm guessing the author is on to something. i found a church that appeals to both of us. a church of free faith. or, as my friend put it, a "funky stew of christianity, buddhism, judaism, paganism and some other isms." anyway, we're going and it seems to be a good fit so far. i mean, no one stared at us or gave us dirty looks when my son, who squirmed in his seat the entire hour, started unbuttoning his shirt because he was hot. he even went so far as to take the darn thing off completely and there he sat in his undershirt and jeans. and when we walked out, the teenagers were standing outside wearing their free hugs t-shirts.

second batch

i made another batch of cake balls and cake pops and i'm here to share some secrets with you in case you make them.

• you really only need about half a can of frosting...just enough moisture to hold the ball together, not enough to make 'em squishy. 
• definitely only make them quarter size. they hold much better and they stay put on the stick to actually make a pop. 
• i found it's best to freeze the balls for at least an hour. the ball is hard enough to withstand dipping in warm chocolate. also, it hardens the chocolate quickly so you have a smooth finish and a round ball. 
• if you sprinkle anything on top, do it quickly. the smaller or finer the pieces, the better (particularly with crushed candy canes). 
• don't try to add anything to the chocolate. you'll get lumpy balls. 
• i prefer the chocolate discs sold in bulk at henry's over the generic discs sold in a bag at michael's (but i know someone who sells dove chocolate products and i'm dying to try theirs. they even have a cool, albeit expensive, chocolate melting machine).
  

this batch came out so much better looking. they tasted better, too. 

and if you're in need of a chuckle, watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vUUHNS_Ew64

sweet jesus, cake balls and more

i am obsessed with my brother's brand-spanking-new canon something-or-other dslr. he came over yesterday and i grabbed that camera, went outside and just snapped photos of everything. the leaves, dried berries on a tree, the dirt, my kids, myself, everything. the photos are amazing and i only used one setting, the automatic one. i have been dreaming about the endless possibilities of photos i could take if only i had a camera like his. sweet jesus, i want one.

i was lucky enough to take a photo of my version of cake balls and cake pops. i'm guessing you remember me gushing about bakerella and i hope you took a moment to check her out because she's awesome. really, she is. if you need more proof, check out her newest post: candy cane christmas tree cupcakes. anyway, i attempted to make her cake balls and pops and realized it really is pretty darn easy. mine aren't as neat and probably won't ever be but they are yumm-o. i used her recipe as a guide but chose to use a chocolate fudge cake mix and frosting. this is what i did:

•  baked cake and let it cool completely
• dumped cake into a big bowl and crumbled
• mixed in full tub of frosting (going forward, i recommend only using 1/2 or 3/4 instead of full tub. it's mushy otherwise.)
• made round balls with my very clean hands and placed them on cookie sheet lined with parchment paper (it's really important to follow bakerella's directions to make the balls quarter-sized. i missed that and my balls might have been half-dollar sized which made them way too heavy to be pops. i ended up with upside down pops.)
• refrigerated overnight
• melted chocolate discs (from the craft store) in microwave on defrost setting, 30 second increments until fully melted (stir frequently)
• dumped ball into chocolate and rolled until covered (i later learned not to roll. look here for details.)
• placed ball back onto cookie sheet and sprinkled with crushed candy canes...for my own version of peppermint bark. i later sprinkled parchment paper with crushed candy canes and then sprinkled more on top if needed.
• refrigerated to cool and then stored them at room temperature
• sampled...mmm
• for the pops, i inserted the stick into the ball before refrigerating. my balls were heavy so they slid down the stick which is why i had to turn them upside down. still working out the kinks on that one. 

i think these little balls are amazing. sure, they lack the smoothness bakerella seems to have mastered but they are exactly me: messy,  my crafting signature.

just look at that photo, though! and this one...

and this one...

and look at these little freckles i just can't get enough of. seriously, i can stare at these all day long. i call them sun kisses and they give me a happy heart.

the best comedies

i jumped into the car today right in the middle of a conversation about condoms and pornos. my husband likes to listen to morning radio shows. anyway, the way they were discussing pornos left me wondering how anyone gets turned on by them. i mean, really, the actors, the plot lines, the music...well, it's all so cheesy. i can't watch a porno without cracking up into hysterical fits. they really are the best comedies. maybe i'm the only one who feels this way because i think i made my husband blush a little when i said all this out loud. his very serious response was, "well, people who watch pornos don't pay attention to that stuff. they watch it for the sex." ew, really? because the sex is just so fake. the panting, the plastic body parts, the screaming, the slapping...all funny, really funny. i can't imagine wanting to get all hot and heavy after watching one. plus, after my hysterical fit of laughter ends all i'm left with is sadness and anger. because then i start to wonder how drugged up the actors are and how they are being manipulated and exploited. i guess that's why i just don't watch them. but i am curious and want to know if you have ever watched one without laughing.

so i know it's all joyful and jolly right now but i have to tell you that my biggest pet peeve is talking on the cell and texting while driving, especially during this busy and stressful time of year. not to mention, it's against the law. argh. i see it everywhere i go and i finally reached my breaking point. i now yell or mime, "GET OFF THE PHONE!" it really drives me nuts. remember the days when we didn't have cell phones? i tried it recently and it was so peaceful and freeing. i don't even get that many calls...maybe four a day, mostly from my husband on his break or something. i did get nervous while driving at night but  i can definitely live without it, can you?

i volunteered in my son's classroom earlier this week and it was such a rewarding experience. i have a deeper appreciation for teachers because, man, do they have a complex job but i'm also a little jealous that they receive unlimited (sweet, sweet) smiles and hugs from their students. all it took was just one little girl to tap me on the shoulder and say, "um, (long pause), um, canigiveyouahug (said just like that, as one long word)?" then, all of a sudden, there were like five kids in line waiting to give me a hug. i'm sure there's some rule that teachers can't give or accept hugs (you know how that goes) but i'm just a big ole mom who couldn't resist. you know, i'm not a huggy person but i think i might be now. actually, my own children made me huggy and kissy but only with them, everyone else was always off limits. now i want a t-shirt that says, "free hugs."

i have been obsessed with owls for a little over a year now. i love them so much i went out and bought owl stamps, owl paper, owl stickers, you name it. but, like with all my crafty stuff, i never really use what i buy. well, last night i went to the zoo and saw something in the gift shop that said, "happy owlidays." how.cute.is.that? i was in charge of putting together a gift for the teacher and instead of buying a card, i made one. in fifteen minutes.
cute, huh? i'm totally using this little line for all my christmas cards (that will be mailed in february). feel free to copy it (i did). i have already come up with thirty five ways to improve this card so i'm sure you can make a better one. if you do, will you share it?
*that means you, a.

a quarter for your thoughts

i'm running short on time but i have so much to say. pardon me while i jump around from topic to topic in order to get it all out.

remember how i said my look is frumpy? well, it is and i just wish i could look a little less frumpy most days. i'm not even talking about being stylish. i just want a little less frump so that when i run into stylish friends at the grocery store i won't want to run down another aisle to escape being seen (that's not really what happened...by the time i saw her it was too late to try to run anywhere. not that i would really run away from her, i wouldn't.). i really blame that encounter on my dear husband who made me go to the grocery store with him even though i just wanted to stay home in pj's and enjoy the cold and the rain. but seriously, how do you stylish women do it -- the hair, the makeup, the clothes -- day in and day out. i get tired just thinking about it. maybe i need a haircut?

maybe my style is dictated by my font type. i love fonts. love them. i never really considered myself to be just one font, though. i change my font like i change my...well, you know. i tend to use comic sans a lot even though i usually want to be taken more seriously. i just figured i'd be the fun, bubbly sort so i was quite surprised (and a bit taken aback) when i took this what font are you quiz  (thanks to ordinary courage) and discovered i am helvetica. dull, predictable and boring. really, that's what it means. great. just great. there really is no hope for me, is there? i guess i better stop hiding behind papyrus and jokerman mt. i'm not giving up, though, i'm not. i know there is a way, some way, i can be the ali edwards font.

so, i read this today on facebook:

It's hard because on the one hand I want to raise an ethical child but on the other, finders keepers, losers weepers, you know?

this generated a lot of buzz...especially from me. it ended up being about a quarter. her daughter found a quarter at the gas station. they returned it. what would you have done? it was just outside the door so i think i would have given it back, too. but then i got to thinking, "we return a quarter but not a penny?" have you ever wondered about that? i don't think i have ever met someone who returned a penny. i think most people find a penny and think, "find a penny, pick it up. all day long, you'll have good luck." heck, i'm guilty of teaching my son that rule. but why is a quarter worthy of being returned to its owner and not a penny? there have certainly been times in my life where the difference between a positive checking account versus a negative account was just a penny. food for thought. 

now that brings me to this funny story about my husband. his response to that status and to returning a quarter was, "i don't care what i find, a quarter or a hundred dollars, i'm keepin' it." this from a man who once gathered the trash from his car into a cup, set it on the ground outside and drove off. that trash included his just-been-cashed paycheck which we really needed in order to stop squatting on our cousin's floor (actually, we got the bed while she and her husband squatted on the floor). yeah, he didn't have anything to say when i brought that up. he just turned around and went down the hall to bed. just so you know, my husband and i are like fire and ice most of the time. i don't know how we manage, but we do. 

yes, we do. thankfully. we're going through a rough patch right now but i'm confident we'll manage to pull through it. do you ever want to hit the person who said marriage was easy, a piece of cake? i do. it seemed easy at one time but the older i get and the longer we're married, it actually has become more work. i'm sure it's because we're like fire and ice and because we learned from the worst examples of successful, long-term, happy marriages. where we once wanted to give up and walk away from each other, we now find it exciting to try to make ours a better union. i still want to hit that person, though. and i will always ogle those ridiculously happy, can't-keep-our-hands-off-each-other type couples, especially if they've been together for fifty some odd years. thank god for those couples. they make me want to try harder so i can be a good example to my children and to other youngsters one day.

just so you know, i don't believe there is just one person out there for us and i don't believe everyone can or should stick it out. ya gotta do what ya gotta do...especially if there is abuse or addiction involved.

so let's end this on a happy note: cake pops. i'm addicted. i haven't eaten one nor have i made any but i want to...i really want to. i think i am going to try it this weekend. i haven't asked permission to use a photo but if you click here it will take you to bakerella.com where you will find amazing photos and easy instructions on how to make your own cake pops. if you make them, take photos and share. i promise to do the same. this woman is amazing and i think i lov'er. if you have time, go to her christmas and some cookies post. look at how organized she is. i love it!

and do you know anything about the pioneer woman? i think i lov'er, too.  

oh, oh, oh, i learned from bakerella that betty crocker is not/was not a real person! huh?!? i read that yesterday and i still can't wrap my brain around that one. you can read more about it at her betty rocker post.

rowing down a river

it's raining today. oh, how i love the rain. rainy days make me so happy. so happy. i throw open the windows, put socks on my feet, drink warm beverages, play good music and just let my body and mind feel the rain. it's even better when you have lights on a tree that you can turn on. the soft glow mixed with natural light, ah, there's nothing better.

this song speaks to me today. not sure why but it does. i'm not a broadway fan but a cousin who is shared this song with me once and i loved it. to be fair, he's classified under easy listening but the sound is a cross between broadway and christian...a place i don't venture too often.

anyway, i have a love/hate relationship with clothes. i love them but i hate the way they look on me. i'm a shorts and t-shirt kind of gal. or jeans and a tee. i'm all about comfort and what i can grab out of the closet with my eyes closed. very frumpy. the only chic thing about me is that i love black. it matches everything, right? i do admire fashion, though. in my daydreams i am very fashionable and cute. very. i love magazines and catalogs because i love looking at very put-together women. one day, that might be me. maybe. hopefully. i want to be one of those women who shop at anthropologie. i went to the store for the first time on saturday and fell in love. in love, i am.

speaking of anthropologie, one of my new favorite shows on tv is man shops globe on the sundance channel. it's about keith johnson and his journey around the world to find one-of-a-kind home furnishings and accessories. he is a buyer-at-large for anthropologie. i love him. move over, brad pitt. keith is my new celebrity boyfriend (which is kind of weird because he reminds me of our cousin, matt, and, well, i don't want to be matt's girlfriend). just watch the show, you'll love it.

i was checking out the blog every chapter today because she has been sharing christmas traditions which i love and am always looking for. in one of her posts she shared a link to christa-taylor and now i am...you guessed it...in love! everything is adorable. the kenziegirl dress and the best friend dress are at the top of my list but seriously, the bathing suit is a must. i love that the shorts are all bermuda style...the only length that should be sold anywhere. i think the best part, however, is that the price won't make you bankrupt. very reasonable. and, 5% of your purchase is sent to an orphanage in cambodia where they will provide care to widows and orphans.
*while i am a strong advocate for helping our fellow american citizens,  i say you can't go wrong with lending a hand to help people all over the world. 

check this out (i just received it in my inbox). if you're crafty, make some cards to send to the armed forces so they have cute, handmade cards to write home on. what a great idea. 

speaking of handmade cards, my dear friend a makes lovely cards. i saw her over the weekend and she gave me some. i'm so lucky. she also gave me a notepad and a bookmark. she made them all. i wish i was that crafty! it is my goal to make a card, a bookmark and a notepad just like hers. 

 

 

what else is in my obsession box? this stuff:

adorable pocket mirrors by madison craft

knitting needle holders by feltique

cute address labels by snailmailcreations

 

inspi(red)

what's inspiring me today, World AIDS Day? well, a few things actually.

eos, the evolution of smooth. i hate dry lips but i also hate putting stuff on my lips that i can feel and/or taste which is the problem with most products. my brother (and go-to man on fashion and beauty) introduced me to eos. it's not too bad. i think i even like it. a lot. it's 95% organic, 100% natural and it feels smooth, just as they say. i can still feel it (barely) but it might just be that my lips are so soft i have to rub them together often. there is definitely no taste even though mine is the honeysuckle honeydew flavor. i especially like that it's a sphere shape with a twist on cap...you can throw it in your bag and not worry about the lid coming off.

and remember my slight obsession with mrs. meyer's cleaning products? well, i was at target (again) and found this holiday scent on *sale* - score! i'm now in love with pine. you know when you buy a candle or something and it says it's pine but you can't really find a trace of pine anywhere in the scent? well, this stuff is bona fide pine. it's like i just went into the forest and touched a pine tree. i love it!

my finished scarf, which i am not in love with. i'm not happy that the stitch doesn't match the hat but i guess it works. flat scarves are just a pain. i'm afraid i still have a lot of practicing to do.

i am in love with the hats, though. i love them. i love the colors, i love the stitch, i love how they feel and i can't wait to see the family of four sporting them.

beast on a dime

i tend to be a helicopter mom...or is it umbrella mom? either way, i watch my son like a hawk. i'm not necessarily paranoid about him getting hurt on the playground or about him getting dirty or touching germs (he's a boy, i got over that about a week after he was born). i'm more paranoid about something happening to him by someone else. maybe i've watched too many movies or i've inherited my grandma's paranoia but i have always been a scaredy cat. big time. beyond normal i've been told. it didn't help that i once met a woman (several years before i was ever pregnant) who had just been released from prison. she was in prison because she had been found guilty of killing the man who kidnapped and raped her seven year old son. i remember thinking, "wow, crazy." i never really thought of that woman too much over the next few years until the day i gave birth and held my son on my chest. i looked at that sweet, sweet boy and immediately thought, "i get it. i totally get it." and it was at that moment that i became a crazy, will-protect-my-son-from-anything type mom. of course, i would never, ever suggest taking a life but you mess with my son, you mess with me. to put it simply, i "can turn beast on a dime."
Quote taken from page 106 of chapter 7 in the book Boys Should Be Boys - 7 Secrets to Raising Healthy Son by Meg Meeker, M.D.

so, it came as a surprise to myself, my husband and most people who know me, that i allowed my son to go on a week-long vacation with my mother. they went to visit my aunt, uncle and cousin at their lake house. we were there earlier in the year and had the most amazing time ever. i let him go because i wanted him to have some time away from his sister (who loves to beat him up), i wanted him to bond with my mom (since he's had to compete with his dear sis for her attention), i wanted him to spend time with family we don't see very often (an elementary school teacher and college professor who love to learn and help others learn) and, most importantly, i wanted him to be one with nature. i wanted him to be able to roam about, to explore and be a young boy in the outdoors without a worry in the world...things he can't really do in the city. when we visited earlier in the year, i remember feeling safe. to me, there is no feeling more joyful than feeling safe. this is the place i wish the whole world was like.

seriously, what is my problem

my brother introduced me to bejeweled on facebook and within seconds i was addicted. seriously. i love bejeweled...from way back. when i bought my first computer (in the 90's, a mac), bejeweled was the one game included in the system. i used to play it all the time. that was before marriage and before kids so it wasn't so bad. i'm now 35 (as you know), married, with kids. what the hell am i doing wasting time playing bejeweled? my husband came home from work last night and stared, with his mouth open and finger pointing, at the tv. the tv had been given a lovely makeover in orange and red crayon, courtesy of our lovely 20montholdish daughter. we have one of the flat panel/screen, lcd things that's fairly new. i couldn't explain it because i didn't even know it was there and i had no idea when it happened. must have been when i put on yo gabba gabba so i could try to beat the high score in bejeweled (nope, i wouldn't dare do such a thing). all i have to say is, thank goodness i buy washable crayons and thank goodness for the screen cleaning gel and soft cloth. and thank goodness for late morning naps so i can blog about it.

bejeweled has clearly taken up most of my free time. i am way behind on my hat/scarf order. i have now made the second hat. that's two out of four hats done and zero scarves. actually, i wish i could blame it all on bejeweled, but i really can't. i blame it on my ocd tendencies. i started with orange and i scrapped the first hat because i thought it was boring. i had my husband teach me a new stitch and i made a second orange hat. i then made a purple hat only to discover the purple was not the right color and it was too thick. i moved on to green and discovered the green was just wrong. so i had to search high and low for a new purple and green yarn and start over. in between all this, i started on the scarves and found that the new stitch doesn't work on a flat scarf and the old stitch looks lame with only one strand of yarn. so, here i am, way behind on my very first order. ugh.

thankfully, my dear friend a sends me great things to look at. check this stuff out:

divine, handmade, barbie outfits at suesdolls.
very cool trashbags and tissue holders by Allyson Hill
cute clutches and totes by Simbiosis
and, my absolute favorite, little magnets by Funky Recycling (my order has been placed)

quite possibly the best

from this

 
 quite possibly the best cookie ever!

recipe found here.

i only sifted once and i used libby's pumpkin instead of fresh. they came out delicious. my husband (who doesn't like my baking, especially my cookies) said, "these are quite possibly the best cookies you have ever made. just throw on some whipped cream and i think these would be better than a pumpkin pie." try some. they're really good.

                                                                                                                    to this

please forgive me, mamoushka

i have been quite judgmental of my family, particularly my mother (mamoushka), ever since the death of my sweet, very premature, boys. it's strange the way people react to death. it's even more strange how people react to the death of a child at birth. my family (and most people i know) pretended it never happened. they sent their condolences and moved on, never mentioning it again. but it was very real. i was pregnant, i did carry twin boys in my very own belly for 23 weeks, i did go into labor and i did deliver two boys. they were born several hours apart but they were both born alive. they breathed, they moved, they were warm to the touch and they both died in my arms within an hour after birth. they are real, they are my sons, a part of me. forever. i think about them almost every minute of my life. so it hurts, deeply, when people don't acknowledge them.

i never understood the feelings of these people (my family, my mother, my friends, strangers) until very recently. in fact, i am one of those people. and it took an episode of brothers and sisters for me to discover this.

thanksgiving of 2000 my mother was informed she had stage four fallopian tube cancer. at the time, it was estimated that she had a 16% chance of surviving one year. i don't believe i ever stopped thinking about myself. how was i going to live without my mom? should i move back to san diego to be with her? why is this happening to me? on and on i went. in fact, with the whole world crying at her feet, my mother never once stopped smiling. she never once complained, she never once told everyone to shut up and let her be. and i don't think any of us, specifically me, never once asked her how she felt, how she really felt. i never asked what it was like to have cancer, to go through chemotherapy, to have everyone crying at your feet? i never asked if she was scared. i never really asked too many questions because i was scared what the answers might be. i only wanted to hear that she was fine and that she would be fine. she actually ended up being fine. she fought the odds and survived the five years it took to be in remission. she is now cancer-free. and i still have never asked her how she really felt, what it was really like.

i sat on the couch next to my mom and listened to two actors have the conversation i should have had with my mom. in fact, i couldn't even look at her until the episode was over. i couldn't get any words to come out of my mouth. so how can i blame her for wanting to forget a period of pain in my life when i'm trying to forget a period of pain in hers? my sons died and she had cancer. it's all real, very real.

so please, mamoushka, will you forgive me? i love you.

life changing

some people have an event or a person who changed their life. i have an album. this album changed my life forever and it's the one cd i always listen to when i'm feeling sad, lonely, homesick, happy, loving, thankful and a bunch of other stuff. i was given this album after my first pregnancy ended in miscarriage and i listened to it every single day, ten million times per day. i seriously don't think i would have made it out of that dark, lonely period without patty griffin and her 1,000 kisses. every song hits my core and speaks to my soul.

full circle

some of you might remember the story about my mom telling me to "toughen up" when i called her crying, begging for sympathy when i was pregnant and battling morning sickness. she lived in another state and i just wanted my mommy. she really said something like, "oh, toughen up. just think about all those poor, indian women who gave birth in the fields and had to strap their babies on their backs to go back to work." yeah, that caused many tears from me but lots of laughter from my co-workers who overheard that conversation. i was finally able to join in the laughter last week when i went to my son's thanksgiving feast at school and saw this:

hey, what's in there anyway?

remember when i mentioned my slight obsession with what people carry in their bags? well, here's a peak into my bag. i'm not too exciting so the contents are quite boring. i generally carry keys, phone, pen, planner, wallet, lipstick and lotion. if there is room, i'll add a book or magazine (or both) and some extra stuff that might come in handy like tylenol, ipod, hair things, notepad, book journal, diapers, wipes, hand sanitizer. i love those people who carry everything-but-the-sink type stuff like bobby pins, safety pins, stain removers, makeup, perfume, receipts, love notes, mail and whatever else you can think of.

lately, i have also been obsessed with what people throw away. i am always shocked by what i see in trash cans or on the sidewalk (i can't believe how many people don't use trash cans). i'm not the prize-winning recycler but i definitely do my part. i get so frustrated when i see cans, plastic bottles and cardboard. recycle people. i am so glad there are still plenty of trash divers looking for this stuff. i know my neighbors in the apartment near us get mad at these people but, really, if they did their part then they wouldn't have to worry about them. take a peek the next time you walk by a public trash can and take some thought into what you throw away.

speaking of bags, this is the latest bag i covet.

I Like:

 
Nerdz Fluorescent         by Harajuku Lovers

searching for last week

as i sit here, i am wondering what happened to last week? i clearly remember tuesday and some of wednesday but what happened to the other days and how can it be a new week already? i don't recall being so busy i would forget the days but that's what must have happened. now i understand why my mom keeps a daily calendar, to remember what she did the day before. must take that into consideration because i hate losing days.

which reminds me, not too long ago i bought this cute mini filofax  (a steal at this store...must devote a post to this later) in bright pink. i love it. i carry it with me all the time. i write stuff down in it but i rarely open it. sad. very sad. that's my problem with planners. i love them and change them often. and i love, love, love to write in them with colorful ink but i'm not a fan of opening them up to find out what i'm supposed to be doing. that's a problem, don't you think? must work on that...any ideas?

yesterday my kids had their photos taken by my favorite photographer. she's from another state but she was in town and asked to photograph them. oh, hell yes, photograph away. she's awesome. we were at the park where there were several families having their holiday photos taken. i think i counted five photographers but mine was the best, the cream of the crop. here's why: she's energetic, fun, enthusiastic and great with kids. she was on the ground, she was standing on the bench, she was playing tag and hide-n-seek and making jokes and she had my kids eating out of the palm of her hand. the other families? they were stuck in stiff poses, trying hard not to stare at us having fun. their photographers were boring and their photos will be boring. our photos will be full of emotion and life. i share this with you so when it's time for you to have photos taken, you'll choose a photographer who is fun and willing to get dirty.

have you ever heard of fred products? my brother had these key caps on his keys today and i fell in love. so many fun things to choose from. i like the matryoshkas measuring cups and the sock monkey key caps. but, seriously, how can you resist the evidence knife or the already been chewed cookies?

oh, what do you think of the orange hat? it's one of my favorites. i'm working on the scarf now which is a pain in the ass but i'm hoping it will be worth it when it's done. i'm a little bit in love with orange now.

too-many-ideas tuesday

i think i mentioned earlier that i am making four hat/scarf sets for a mom of three girls. green, orange, purple and pink. since i received the order, i can't stop thinking of patterns, yarns, decorations, etc to use. i'm done with the first hat and i have come up with a dozen better ideas and it's driving me crazy. this is my first customer and i want it to be perfect. plus, they'll be wearing the hats/scarves in a series of photos which could be displayed on the photographer's website. no pressure. so, i need your advice. the ladies will be sporting converse in matching colors. the pink shoe is actually pink and purple checkered. do i:

a. make three solid sets and one fun/crazy set (to match the checkered shoe)?
b. make all solids? maybe adorn with a bright, colorful flower?
c. get a little fancy and trim the sets in fun fur?
d. use a different pattern for each hat?
e. choose multi-colored yarn?

i think i know what i'm going to do but i also want to know your opinion. anyone?

now, i didn't really pay much attention to my SweetPea's first birthday and, sadly, she didn't have a party. i often think birthday parties are overrated. don't get me wrong, i love birthday parties and i love going to them but it's a bit awkward to throw one for myself or for my kids. plus, i think most kids have way too many toys (mine included) and toys are usually what they get as presents. with that being said, i am shocked that i am already planning a party for her second birthday. a friend told me about a party she went to over the weekend and i am in love with the theme. i have already purchased some items and my mind is boggled by cookies, cakes, decorations, party favors, etc. can you say crazy? i'm not sure i'll be able to stand the four month wait until her birthday. i'm also in idea mode for my son's birthday. i want to have a party where the kids do something to pay it forward. would it be weird to have a party for the kids at a homeless shelter or for the kids in the hospital who have a terminal illness? or maybe a party where the kids play games and sing with senior citizens? what do you think?

so with all of these ideas fighting for space in my mind, i also happened upon this blog and i am now totally obsessed. bakerella rocks.

hobos and more

i love, love, love my new crossbody hobo bag (see photo). mine, of course, is pink and navy stripe and it's delightful. i have been on the hunt for this bag for months and i finally found it on clearance at old navy for under eight bucks. sweet deal. i'm kind of obsessive (or is it compulsive) when i love something so much. i always want it in every color. i found it in several colors (including black which is perfect for every day use) on the old navy website. i'm telling you, this is the perfect bag...you can throw in tons of junk and throw out organization (i have always had a passion for big, messy purses. i'm also obsessed with what people carry in their bags. what do you carry in yours?).

so here i sat earlier today staring at my perfect bag when i stumbled upon soule mama's blog and found a bag that rivaled my own. then i searched around and found the whole darn collection and, oh, was i in heaven! bayan hippo handmade is divine, simply divine. especially since she doesn't stop at just bags. minikhippo is a must-see. kimonos, jumpers and pinafores, oh my.

me time

the boys went out for a few hours and the girl is asleep, it's me time. here i sit drinking my coffee and just enjoying the silence. it's hard to concentrate, however, because all i smell are my wonderfully basil-scented hands. i can't get enough of 'em. i have been obsessed with mrs. meyer's cleaning products for a while now, but i have never tried the dish soap until today. it was on sale (super cheap) at target so i bought some yesterday. man, my hands are super soft and they smell delicious. i just want to do dishes all day. do you think it's safe to bathe in dish soap?

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look what i just found! i don't need to bathe in it, i can just get a scent diffuser for the house. amazing!

did i mention i have a slight obsession with aprons? it's true. it all started earlier this year when i was reading through this magazine that i discovered this publication and my obsession began. i have a family member who sewed aprons for all her daughters because it was a memory of her mother. how sweet is that? i want the apron to make a comeback. not just in the kitchen but as a fashion accessory to wear in public. whenever i wear my apron i always feel like super-woman which is why i tend to wear it longer than necessary. my dear friend, a, is also obsessed. she sent me this link last night. if you're like us, check it out.

this basil scent is driving me crazy. maybe i should have my husband bathe in it, instead?

you know there's a problem when

you get off the phone with the registered nurse who told you to take your child to the emergency room and you're contemplating updating your facebook status to reflect this.

i'm guilty. i'm also guilty of making fun of people who update their facebook status every two seconds...because, really, who cares? i tend to change mine daily (sometimes less) and each time i change it i wonder why? why? why? i think i had way too much time on my hands yesterday. and, no, i did not update my status before leaving to the e.r. phew.

today, i am obsessed with this, this, and this (oh okay, this too) because tomorrow i am back to no sugar. i cut out 95% of my sugar intake a few weeks ago and have never felt better!! i caved when baking cupcakes for the cupcake walk at the halloween carnival. then, i figured i might as well just wait until after my birthday to cut sugar again. i didn't overindulge...until today. ugh.

i'm also obsessed with yarn. colorful yarn. i can sit in the yarn store for hours just taking it all in. i love to feel it, to smell it and to just look at it until inspiration kicks in. i often wish i could just roll around in it. which is exactly how i imagine my playboy spread except i'd be surrounded by colorful, luxurious yarn. you never know, right? i might be fifty and fabulous with a smokin' body, oozing sexy and the time might just be right. inspiration to stay off the sugar, that's for sure. but back to the yarn, i am on assignment to make 4 sets of hats and scarves. orange, purple, pink and green...colors after my own heart.

happy birthday to me

i am officially thirty-five. thirty-five. it sounds old, doesn't it? when i think of my mom, i usually think of her at thirty-five. that's me now. thankfully, i don't feel as old as it sounds. i actually feel younger than i normally do...woo-hoo.

anyway, the entrance to my thirties was marked by sadness and grief so i thought i needed something new and exciting to mark the halfway point. hence, the new blog. i tend to be a bit carefree and i live in semi-organized chaos so that's what you'll find here...me, jumping from topic to topic from one obsession to the next.

so what am i obsessed with today? alexander henry fabrics.specifically, the pink yui kokeshi dolls print. love it! i bought this skirt today for my SweetPea and then i scoured the internet for more fabric because it's simply irresistible.

oh, and of course, bob dylan's christmas album because who can really resist bob? and who can resist helping to feed america?

and finally, the birthday card from my mom because i am one of those people still seeking "mom's approval." Here is what the inside says:

I used to take care
of your every need,
now I see you
doing the same
for your child.

And I realize,
all at once,
our roles in life
are changing.

I know you can do it all,
you're my strong,
independent girl,
but I want you to know
I will always be here
whenever you need me.

I Love You.
Happy Birthday
Mom
xxxooo
(a Carlton Cards card)